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Great Relationships Depend On Good  Communication!


Nowhere is this more true than in the matter of relationship dynamics. The way that you treat your partner is probably exactly a mirror of the way they treat you, and so if you are kind and loving, or at least if you see yourself as kind and loving, when a breakup happens, the wound and pain are all the greater because what you feel you've given out is so valuable and precious.

Yet the truth of the matter is of course that in every breakup, both the ex-boyfriend in the ex-girlfriend have issues that are true for them, and issues that are true for the other partner get in the way of clear perception.

Rarely has a relationship breakup due to one person's actions alone: it's always due to the combination of people who don't deal with their historical wounds, their emotional wounds from childhood, the issues that prevent them being the fully mature person they can be.

So when you break up with somebody, and you really want to get back together with them because you know that you love them very deeply and dearly, and that they are fundamentally the right person for you, then your first action has to be to work on your old issues and old wounds.

Only then will you be in a position to actually deal with the problem is that you face, only then will you be in a position to deal with the issues that kept you apart in the first place, and only then of course will you be able to have a mature relationship free of anger, rage, grief, and general emotional anxiety.

One of the best ways to do this is to engage in shadow work which is a form of Jungian psychology or active psychotherapy, which allows you to access call wounds, in a very quick and easy way, in a safe container of people who are supporting you, and then radically altered the historical records that you have in your mind, so that you see yourself in a very different way.

However, whether or not you take a shadow work is an option to deal with historical wounds that are preventing you from enjoying a relationship now is entirely up to you.

My concern really is about practical techniques that you can use right here right now to enable you to move forward into a place of new relationship with a partner who you've decided you really want to get back together with after of relationship breakup.

One of the best techniques that I found is a program set out by Michael Fiore, in an Internet program named "text your ex back".

Text your ex back (click here to find out about texting your partner back) is a program that is designed to communicate with your partner in a way that doesn't raise the issues that separated you in the first place when your relationship broke up.

You'll find that your boyfriend or girlfriend, or rather your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend, is responsive to a certain approach if they have any love you wish to get back together with you.

relationship and health adviceThat approach causes not an emotional one, nor is it seduction, nor is it charm, nor is it whining and neediness — all of which are approaches used by people who want to get back together with an ex-partner, but strangely enough, these approaches rarely work. I'll leave you to work out why.

Much productive approaches to generate a sense of belonging, a sense of togetherness, a sense that actually your relationship is the right one in the world for all the reasons that a mature couple would see living together as a good option: support, companionship, mutual respect, love, admiration, and so on. These are the values of humanity at its finest.

So what's with the idea of text thing next partner to get back together? Has Mike Fiore lost his mind?

Can it really be true that texting your partner, or rather your ex-partner, is a way of establishing a relationship that is meaningful and productive? Well, modern psychology suggests that there are many different behavioural techniques that can get people back together after breakup, and one of them is to divorce their feelings from their desires.

In other words you're not going to start trying to get back together with your ex because you believe that it's going to be good for your ego, or because you feel lonely without them; you get back together with an ex partner because you actually believe that's the best thing for both of you, in the long-term for the sake of your personal growth and development, not to mention your happiness and relationship success.

So Mike Fiore allows you to approach your partner, your ex-partner, By sending text messages, all of which have been carefully prescribed uniform your that allows you to divorce emotional wounds from your communication and actually set forth in a matter-of-fact way what it is you want and how you want it.

Truth of the matter is, a lot of communication these days is done by text message, so why we should be surprised that the concept of relationship repair taking place in the same way is an open question.

I want to write briefly about a program that is available on the Internet called Capture His Heart and Make Him Love You Forever (relationship and dating advice).

I know there is a great deal of cynicism about programs like this, but the simple truth of the matter is that they can be extremely useful in enabling people to build an intimate relationship which provides them with fulfilment and emotional satisfaction.

I should emphasize that Capture His Heart has been reviewed very thoroughly in a number of places, including by me, a practicing therapist and counselor, and it has been applauded by everybody who has seen it. You may wonder what the qualifications are to write an Internet program consisting of dating advice: well, they probably are just about the same as the qualifications to write an Internet site offering advice on any subject — that is to say, that you have experience in the field, you can write well, you're an intelligent individual, and you simply know what you're talking about.

relationship and health adviceI don't mean to be facetious when I say this, because actually those are all very specific and quite essential attributes. The individuals in question are Claire Casey and Michael Fiore, who are experienced in the field of relationship advice and Internet programming. Together they have brought the skills necessary to bear are very helpful and essential program which can enable people to build intimacy and enjoy happy and successful relationships.

Michael Fiore starts his program by offering insightful women into the behavior of men, explaining what makes men behaving the way they do, and what motivates them to pursue women in a relationship.

relationship and health adviceHe provides great emphasis on traditional gender roles, a viewpoint which may not be popular with feminists, with which I fully is agree, mostly because my own understanding of human nature gathered over years of therapy and counseling is that we are most fulfilled when we operate within the dictates of our genetic inheritance.

And there is nowhere that the genetic inheritance we have within us influences our behavior than in the area of dating and relationships. You may not believe this now, but I would suggest that after you've reviewed Mike Fiore's program, Capture His heart and Make Him Love You Forever, you may well have good reason to change your mind!

I've heard from hundreds of women, who have told me that quite literally that they have never understood male behavior in a way that Michael Fiore has explained.

And I can confirm, having bought the program, that he and his co-author, Claire Casey, have indeed broken down male behavior into its fundamental components, and offered an explanation for women of male psychology which is certainly one of the best available on the Internet.

Now of course establishing a successful relationship is not just about understanding the behavior of the opposite sex. Indeed, you need advice on dating behavior, intimate relationships, dealing with your own emotional issues, and coming to understand your partner in a way that builds trust and intimacy.

The great thing about capture his heart and make him love you for ever is that it provides all this information in a simple form that people can readily understand without entering into a complicated process of counseling and therapy.

The short fact of the matter is that I don't think you will find a better relationship advice program this one anywhere on the Internet.

Successful Loving, Happy Relationships

A clandestine affair might seem exciting (in your mind or in actuality when it happens), but it cannot compare with giving an orgasm to the woman you married, the woman whom you love and with whom you share everything in your life.

And when you do learn how to give her this incredible God-given pleasure, you might be amazed at how she will become a more exciting person to be around, and how that life-numbing boredom that led you to think about possibly cheating (or maybe actually doing it) will disappear once excitement with an excited spouse has entered your life.

And of course, the only reason a woman would cheat on the man she loves and is married to and wants to spend the rest of her life with is because she's sexually frustrated, she keeps "getting to the edge of the cliff" and never goes over it.

This is about the most horrendous physical frustration that any human body can endure. Men can't even imagine getting to the point of almost having an orgasm and never having it because they never experience that. It's truly beyond their comprehension. And some women have endured this for years!

Many women have told me that sex is not that important, that they're really looking only for affection, only for hugs and "I love you's," but trust me, if her husband takes the time and trouble to learn how to give her an orgasm every time they intercourse, that's the kind of affection that will keep her faithful and will let her know you cared enough to learn how to show her she's loved.

And who says the hugs and "I love you's" won't be there with the orgasm? Why do so many women think it's either one or the other, not both?

The bottom line is that every woman who loves a man wants to surrender to that man, wants him to make her have an orgasm through intercourse, but up till now he didn't know how.

relationship and health advice

But once he learns how and lovingly teases her and drives her wild and then makes her come in this extraordinary way, this will create incredible respect (he took control of my body) and love (he cares enough to make this unbounded ecstasy happen for me), and intimacy (I feel closer than I ever thought possible to the man I love).

So it takes the love of the husband to understand the possible problem and to have the strength to take charge in the sexual arena. The problem only happens if the man believes it when his wife tells him "It doesn't feel good," "Stop," "Don't do that anymore," etc.

When he's making love with the technique, some women are subconsciously afraid of losing control, even though that's what they really want. And that fear can only be overcome when it's replaced by love. A woman must know her husband loves her, and he must take charge of her body.

He cannot be intimidated by her. He must realize that every woman deep down desires her man to take control of her body—not her life, not her money, but her body—and he must take charge of her body.

This is why love and faithfulness and commitment and marriage are so important to a truly happy sex life. When you're in love and are loved in return by someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, someone you trust totally, you will allow him to take charge of your body and give you sexual nirvana every single time you make love.

You cannot have a great marriage without that deep sexual intimacy. This is what being "in love" is all about.

 

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Sexual Power

Not only is it tremendously exciting for a man to feel sexual power over the woman he loves, it is even more exciting for his wife to feel his sexual power. But some women are afraid of a man's sexual power.

I can't tell you how many times women have called me on live call-in talk-radio shows and screamed at me that every married woman should be in control of her own orgasm and should learn to masturbate so she's not dependent on her husband.

I have argued that the only reason women say this is because these women have given up on their husbands ever learning how to give them orgasms through intercourse, and how sad this is.

But once a husband learns how to do this, real sexual excitement will take over the marriage, and if he felt love from her before, he won't believe the love he's going to feel from her now.

As I mentioned before, after I did the survey of 486 married women from all over the country in 1980, 1 found out that I was not the only woman "faking" it with my husband (remember, this was 1980 and nobody talked about faking then; it was still in the closet).

Up till then I honestly thought I was the only one, and I also thought there was something wrong with me, because every time we made love, my husband had an orgasm, so there was obviously nothing wrong with him—it had to be me. Or with our sexual techniques.

This ultimately led to my divorce. Let me give you a short scenario on why marriages break up and why husbands and wives cheat.

Everyone is looking for a "soul mate." I don't care who you are, a bachelor-type man or a career-oriented woman; underneath it all there is a longing to find your "better half" and become a perfectly together whole.

Now two people meet, fall in love, and get married, each confident that the other is the missing half, the long-sought-after soul mate.
The first few months are divine, and then once in a while the wife will get a little testy and he responds testily.

If an orgasm gives endorphins, her body is screaming out for the missing endorphins resulting from the missing orgasms. And as more months go by, more spats.

How many men could go six months or a year without an orgasm or hardly ever having one? And how cranky, crabby, bitchy would he be if he did go six months or a year without one?

So she bitches about the top he left off the toothpaste tube, the bills, etc., and he screams back. But she's not bitching about bills or toothpaste tops; her body is very tense and nervous, making her mind and spirit tense and nervous just as his would be if he never got satisfaction.

As the spats continue and slowly worsen after several years, and the yelling gets louder, each starts to think, "This can't possibly be my soul mate. I made a mistake." And each starts to secretly re-look for a new and different soul mate. And the marriage is figuratively over.

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