Laugh It Up | 5 Rules For Men To Live A Happy Life
Another Great Joke Brought to you by Amazingjokes.com
5 Rules for Men
FIVE RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW TO A HAPPY LIFE:
1. It’s important to have a woman, who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.
2. It’s important to have a woman, who can make you laugh.
3. It’s important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn’t lie to you.
4. It’s important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
5. It’s very, very important that these four women do not know each other.
For more great jokes go to http://amazingjokes.com
Tags: adultry, cheating, compatability, dating, good in bed, men, womenRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Laugh It Up!
59 opinions for Laugh It Up | 5 Rules For Men To Live A Happy Life
Misogonistic douche-bag
Apr 13, 2008 at 7:28 pm
Wow very cool! Being heterocentric, sexist and objectifying women is extremely respectable.
Marius
Apr 13, 2008 at 7:50 pm
How much they pay you for email addresses?
Scott
Apr 13, 2008 at 9:08 pm
To commenter number 1. It’s a joke. Get over it. There are worse jokes out there. This one is pretty tame. I’m sure if it was a joke poking fun of men (which it kind of is) you’d laugh.
To Marius: If you’re implying that I get paid for e-mail addresses, I would like to know where you get that idea from.
Scott
Apr 14, 2008 at 6:11 am
And by the way, if your going to call me a name at least know how to spell them and Don’t use big words unless you know what they mean…or at least google them
I’ll help you out…
misogynistic- hatred, dislike, or mistrust of women.
Heterocentric- Having different centres; said of rays that do not meet at a common focus.
Niether of these words apply to me. Thanks for stopping by. I’ll have more “misogynistic” and “heterocentric” jokes every monday
Kelly
May 5, 2008 at 4:54 am
Laugh It Up | 5 Rules For Men To Live A Happy Life
Good blog, For every man success there is a women
Scott
May 5, 2008 at 5:29 am
So very true, kelly
John
May 7, 2008 at 11:30 am
@Misogonistic douche-bag :
Funny, I first heard that one two or three years ago, but roles reversed… I guess you wouldn’t have been scandalized by that version (I, at least, wasn’t)…
Katie
May 7, 2008 at 5:41 pm
Wow, I’m a woman and even I think it’s funny. Obviously, I would not enjoy this if it was true of my husband but the joke it funny!
Good one Scott! :D
Scott
May 7, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Thanks Katie! I wish I could take credit for these jokes as my own but I owe it to Amazinejokes.com
JD
May 7, 2008 at 7:43 pm
Very funny (maybe even amazingly funny!)
Yea… I just went to that website, and all of the links are broken…any idea around it?
Adam Seale
May 7, 2008 at 9:51 pm
That’s awful. xD
I love it. That’s just awful.
LOLLERDERBY
May 7, 2008 at 11:52 pm
YAY DRAMA ON THE INTERNET NEVER GETS OLD! BILLIONS OF OPINIONS FLOAT LIKE TURDS IN THE INFORMATION SUPER-SEWER!
harvey
May 8, 2008 at 12:11 am
Great joke. The fifth one is probably the most important. Keep it up.
JFC
May 8, 2008 at 2:05 am
@Misogonistic douche-bag.
I respect my four bitches.
JFC
May 8, 2008 at 2:07 am
Or is it five?
I’ll check my phone.
Nadine
May 8, 2008 at 2:12 am
Kinda funny, it clearly doesn’t objectify women though ..
PS
Heterosexism is a term used to describe the presumption that everyone is heterosexual, and/or the belief that heterosexuals are naturally superior to homosexuals and bisexuals.
René
May 8, 2008 at 2:47 am
Scott, “To Marius: If your implying” “at least know how to spell”. You said it yourself!
your implying?
Scott
May 8, 2008 at 3:31 am
Spelling and grammar are two different things…and I never said I was any good at either of them. lol…I always do that…and I always get corrected. I must have missed class that day 25 years ago.
Gary
May 8, 2008 at 4:52 am
haha good joke man.
…and some people need to lighten up lol
Scott
May 8, 2008 at 5:00 am
perhaps their server went down for a bit. I was just there and everything seemed to be working fine. Just click on “10 more” or search the archive. That site has been around for years and it’s filled with jokes.
Scott
May 8, 2008 at 5:21 am
Thanks for the info, Nadine. Perhaps that is what the first comment meant…either way the word heterosexism still doesn’t apply to myself or this joke.
I suppose I could have posted 4 different versions of the joke as to please everyone sexual preferences…but I’m sure someone would still have been offended.
Robbie
May 8, 2008 at 6:25 am
haha, cool joke dude
Robbie
May 8, 2008 at 6:26 am
fortunatly i dont need rule five though lol
cDub
May 8, 2008 at 6:32 am
If this post has upset you in any way, please visit this site and learn what you can do to feel better.
(link removed :( sorry)
Scott
May 8, 2008 at 7:15 am
wow, that was terrible cDub. That picture of the deer and the bunny almost made me puke. and the one of Paris Hilton was quite revolting.
But seriously…there are somethings that should not be photographed. Sorry, I had to take the link down. Some unsuspecting people really won’t want to see that stuff. And I’m not just talking about Paris Hilton.
Geoserv
May 8, 2008 at 12:07 pm
STUMBLED!
Good post, some people just can’t take a joke.
tricia
May 8, 2008 at 12:59 pm
I’m a girl and I laughed.
Therefore its funny.
jon
May 8, 2008 at 2:15 pm
lol… i was not expecting that 1
René
May 8, 2008 at 3:30 pm
Trish, how many men? Honest?
René
May 8, 2008 at 3:33 pm
BTW, half hour after midnight here. Read ye answer moro morning ;)
Shelton Harlow
May 8, 2008 at 5:58 pm
You know how to turn a fox into an old nag?
Marry her!
Sara D.
May 9, 2008 at 12:42 am
Thanks for the laugh!
Meldan
May 9, 2008 at 12:46 am
STUMBLED BABY
Solid joke, true though
knev
May 9, 2008 at 1:08 am
Women makes things beautiful , if you want to advertise any product , you need a women .
For man’s life look beautiful , women is every where ……
DocZayus
May 9, 2008 at 3:24 am
@Misogonistic douche-bag: You’re probably woman #1, you sure as hell don’t fit the part for #2, #3 or #4, and then again, you’re probably not good at being #1 either.
Godd luck with that.
JAB_au
May 12, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Poster one, PC thugs like yourself should simply not use the internet, you’re to easy for the rest of us to offend with a little harmless humor.
PC thugs remind me of people like Hitler and Stalin. How quickly the world forgets for the sake of not offending others.
Evilbelgian
May 13, 2008 at 8:17 am
Classic, well you have a thumbs up from me
rowan.torr@hotmail.com
May 14, 2008 at 10:01 pm
buddy how big of a loser are u?…. scott no talent loser why wouldnt i just go to the site and bypass all ur good for nothing bullshit ur a chump buddy get a life
Scott
May 15, 2008 at 2:28 am
I’m a huge loser! That’s why people like yourself have to leave insulting comments for no particular reason. Maybe one day I will be half as cool as you are…oops, I’m sorry. As U R! Next time feel free to bypass the site…buddy.
Alex
May 15, 2008 at 10:50 am
Hahaha! Funny!
Alex
May 16, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Life is hilariously cruel, much like this joke
Scott
May 16, 2008 at 7:25 pm
Sadly there are guys out there are guys out there that try to balance this type of stuff. I have a hard enough time figuring out one woman. I can’t imagine trying to work the minds of 4 women
rprebel
May 17, 2008 at 1:04 am
Scott, your comments are almost as funny as the joke itself. Internet trolls are a nuisance; you’ve found a way to make anonymous attacks from total losers amusing. Thanks for that.
Wayne
May 19, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Great joke, screw ‘em if they don’t get it. Let’s change things up…trolls need not be the focus of a good joke…right?
True story. Was at a dance club and realized that 3 girls that I was dating/screwing had all shown up that night.
I danced with each and explained that I’m having a great time dancing with different people tonight. I ended up walking out with a 4th girl whom I have been with now for the past 10 years, and luckily for me she accomplishes all the above.
I can still dance/screw whomever I want as well, but I don’t since it’s not a taboo thing anymore. I think the taboo part makes it more fun. For me at least.
Again, good joke!
Zabimaru
May 26, 2008 at 5:25 am
I agree that Scott’s comments really made this funnier. The joke was at least a chuckle, but reading Scott’s responses to stupid comments was truly enjoyable.
Cheers
Scott
May 27, 2008 at 8:31 am
Glad people dig my comments back to the abusive and negative people. There are always people that either can find a negative side in anything or just like to get under people’s skin in an attempt to make them look stupid. But it’s the internet and it’s expected. You know what they say…
dayam
Jun 21, 2008 at 11:07 pm
Scott: You are a cock. You have no life. You seriously feel the need to frequent this page and defend your comments. Go outside.
Yupper.
Jun 22, 2008 at 1:08 am
@Rene: ok, grammar cop. He didn’t misspell anything. Dumbass. That’s just bad grammar.
Maybe, you need a lesson in 3rd grade english.
Bitch.
Adam
Jun 22, 2008 at 4:42 am
i liked the joke, thought it was quite funny.
i wanna see the link you removed tho.. haha u should have left it but just had in caption, do not click, it has etc etc. haha oh well
STUMBLED :)
Scott
Jun 22, 2008 at 7:42 am
Dayam, I don’t frequent this page to defend my comments. I write this page, moron.
Besides, there is nothing to defend. People like yourself sit behind your computer and insult people like me for no reason. It makes you feel good because you obviously have a low self esteem and anything you can do to feel better about yourself is a small dose of “I Am Cool” to your ego.
Wayne
Jun 22, 2008 at 1:40 pm
High road people!
Ending with ‘why don’t you fuck off’ really impressed me. I expected more from B5 Media, but I guess I shouldn’t…
Scott
Jun 22, 2008 at 1:54 pm
There. Happy? I removed it. But I get far too tired of stupid people trying to belittle me for no reason and sometimes you have to stop being Mr. nice guy. Was I supposed to thank him for calling me a cock and telling me I have no life. I could be like other people and just moderate and delete comments like that from stupid people but I don’t. Here I go having to “defend” myself because someone didn’t like something I said.
Wayne
Jun 22, 2008 at 5:18 pm
Well, I’m pretty much indifferent actually. You sound pretty stressed with your comments and should probably take a step back, deep breath and all that…
No, thanking him is not the solution, neither is censoring comments and removing or editing will lessen your credibility.
I just think that when you stoop to their level, you’re no better than them. Let them say what they will, because they will, but your comments back really show who you are as a person too. Just an observation, no need to feel you need to defend yourself from my comments also. Just trying to help…
Scott
Jun 22, 2008 at 5:42 pm
I’m not stressed over any comments. If you search any of my comments, you will see that I never stoop to their level. Just this one time and it probably didn’t help that I was already a bit ticked because of some dogs getting in my trash during the night…twice.
dijon
Jun 24, 2008 at 10:24 pm
ha, good joke. stumbled on this, it made my day.
not so much the joke but the awesome flaming!
especially douche-bag up there, wtf?
and the guy who asked how much you get paid for each email, lol@him.
thanks scott, i truly enjoyed this page, and I attribute that to you!
Recruitment Process Outsourcing
Jun 25, 2008 at 3:26 pm
The ending was the icing on the cake.
Recruitment Oursourcing
Jun 27, 2008 at 2:55 pm
I do not and never will find any of these types of jokes funny. Women are insecure as it is when it comes to their man and by jokes like these it only worsens it. Men need to stop trying to find the perfect woman who does everything they say. Women are human too.
Scott
Jun 27, 2008 at 7:16 pm
Men are human and insecure as well and women need to stop expecting men to know what’s on their mind all the time, or not fart, or have friends that like to hang out. The list could go on but the fact is men and women have their differences that you have to learn to live with…one of those things that may make you insecure is your lack of sense of humor. Every man looks for a woman with a sense of humor.
You know what I don’t find funny…outsourcing.
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